Naturally Dreamy

A blog about my life as an INFP living with an ESFJ, INTJ, and my pup. I blog about earth-friendly living and life through my eyes – not necessarily in that order. Come put your feet up where life is Naturally Dreamy!


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Real Talk with Me :)

I have some thoughts. Some feelings. Things I’ve been trying not to tell people out of concern I’ll come off as nutty. These are some thoughts I’ve been having. This may be more of a ramble, but each subsection has a sorta point to it. 🙂 Feel free to share your recent thoughts, too.

Three years ago, a cashier was nice to me – like over and above nice. I spent a year and a half in limbo, trying to figure out what to do about it. Nobody else knew.

Of course I came to the conclusion that the only sane thing for me to do was to do nothing. Which I solidly did while having my heart stop every time I nearly ran into him, or BT commented on something he did, and scribbling down every time I ran into him in my journal while laughing at myself – because every shopping trip he was there something weird happened.

This January I joined an online dating site, while I have zero interest in dating. This was the year I was going to do things I’d wanted to do, and I’d been curious about these-here dating sites for a while.

As my life usually goes, I messaged one dude who looked really nice, but sent back the wEirDest and most pat messages, and I messaged one dude just to say “hey, there’s a club for that interest, just in case you didn’t know.” He asked me if I liked the dating site, and a couple of other well-thought out questions, and from there an instant acquaintanceship sprang up.

He, BT and I met up and talked for 5 hours in a coffee shop, while rain clouds gathered overhead. The way home was hairy as the rain poured down, and the slick black roads concealed potholes and lane lines, but I was excited about talking to him again.

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Selective Memory

In school, I briefly took a logic course. There was a chapter on “selective memory” which I found disturbing.

As I recall, the idea is, say you go into a photo booth, 10 times. 8 out of those 10 times you get pricked. Likely as not, when you think about going into a photo booth next, you’re going to think or say, “I don’t want to. I always get hurt when I go in there.”

But the truth of the matter is, twice, you didn’t get stabbed and you had a great time. But either a positive or a negative memory has the capability or overshadowing other memories so that really truly in your mind you only remember the negative/positive experiences.

Also, the other thing is you’re more likely to notice when something happens versus when something doesn’t happen. Usually, unless they are being facetious, someone wouldn’t say, “Remember that time you didn’t tell a joke?”

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Homesick

There’s an odd thing about me that not many know.

I don’t even know if my family knows.

I can get homesick.

I often do. I was always asked as a wee kid if I had to go back to my house in the middle of the night because I couldn’t stand the length of the sleepover. I have NEVER returned early, and have sometimes stayed later.

But I usually have that longing not too long in, or near the end of a trip to go back home.

I love being with my friends. When I’m away from them I want to travel to them.

I love being out of my house. When I’ve been in too long I want to go somewhere, anywhere!

My friends are my second life, and the friends I have are closer to second families than actual friends. We are that close. But yet, there is something family about my family that makes me want to come back.

Our home is not a place – our home has always been each other. But, we do fulfill that totally.

When I’m away I get a break from the things that break me down, but at the same time I am not whole without them.

I’m not dealing with an INTJ while being a feeler-perceiver. I’m not coping as my ESFJ Mom talks in an unhelpful yet so cheerful and happy way. I’m free of rebuke, free of correction, and free to be me.

Yet I miss my home.

I want to go back.

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Because no matter how less there is of a bad thing, nobody else has the good things my family has. My family is MINE. And the fact that we have one, is even more surprising.

Because our family is blood, but only just. More than in other families we’ve chosen each other. We aren’t one to say “You’re blood, we have to stay together.” We are by merit. We are by if the other person is detrimental to our health, we will encourage each other to eject. We are sure to make sure we do not stay in super-poisonous relationships. So there is no guarantee we would be family if we weren’t not also friends.

But we are. I have one, and now more than ever, I’m so patriotic about it. They’re my family and you should love them too. Let me show you the ways. They’re awesome.

Never have I left early. Yet I’ve always been homesick halfway through, wanting nothing more than to get back. But I’m with the other ones I love, and I couldn’t be more grateful.

Homesick: it’s weird, but a blessing, because you have a ‘home’ you want to go back to.

It’s a place – not perfect – not always helpful – but don’t get me wrong, never EVER bad.

I’m at home there. I actually have a home that I’m at home at – words that I have no definition for! Isn’t that cool?

Q&A:

Have you ever been homesick? What did you do about it?


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Post-Recovery Shopping

(First of all, I wanted to say sorry for the donut pic overload yesterday. I couldn’t decide which were best, and I was so excited that some turned out well! Sorry!

Second, I started a Twitter account – I actually read Privacy Policies, and although I wanted to make a YouTube account the policy (Google’s) was far too invasive for me to be comfortable with. Most of the YouTuber’s I follow have Twitter, so I can interact with them on there. Like submitting questions for Malinda Kathleen Reese’s FAQ’s. 🙂 I have absolutely no idea what I am doing on there, but if you want to find me, I am GigglePop! @NaturallyDreaMe)

Now to the main course!

Shopping Trips Manchester

Shopping while recovering from anorexia can be really stressful. Your brain wants to heal, but your mind is telling you all sorts of falsehoods.

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